CHAPTER EIGHT: Short Transitional Chapter is Short and Transitional

THOR:  Zooey, this is Wayne.  Since you two won the heir poll, you have to get married.  Do it fast and then move out.

Actually, Thor, since Zooey’s heir, she has to stay IN the house.  With you.  For the rest of eternity.

THOR:   D=

ZOOEY:  I’m right here, you douche.

WAYNE:  herp derp

ZOOEY:  So I’m not down for arranged marriage and all that, but I do want to be heiress, because my brother’s kind of a lamer.  So for our wedding, I want there to be butterflies.



ZOOEY:  – and violins and lobster and you have to come into the church in an astronaut suit and –

They’ve actually been standing out here planning their wedding ALL.  GODDAMN.  DAY.

Thor, what have you done?

THOR:  Eeeeeeeeeeeeeee I don’t have to deal with her anymore!  I am excite!

Jeeze.  Don’t pee your pants or anything.

Oh, crap.  Sorry, Thor.

THOR:  What the shit is this?!

Don’t worry, buddy.  I’ll give you a makeover in a second.  =(

It depresses me that Thor is an elder.  I don’t want him to die, he’s my founder, and he might be kind of a dick, but he loves Judy and he’s so pretty.  😦 😦 😦

Well.  At least the robe and the leather pants make me feel a little better.

THOR:  I’m old.  😦

It’s okay, sweetie.  It happens to the best of us.

Anyway, since the reign of generation one is upon us, I figured it was prudent to build some painting skills.  I’m not sure what, exactly, that thing is, but it looks like it’ll be good money.  Maybe Zooey and Wayne will have enough for an actual honeymoon.  How does France sound, bb?

ZOOEY:  Yaaaay, going to Champs Les Sims has been in my Want cue for weeks!

Yeah.  I know.  >_>

Painting seems to be the only thing Zooey’s good for.  She can’t cook worth a damn, and with Judy gone, the only thing anybody’s eating these days is… that stuff.  What the fuck is that, anyway?

ZOOEY:  Spaghetti.  😦

God you’re going to make an awful wife.

ZOOEY:  Oh, Wayne, I can’t believe you actually came over for dinner and ate what I made.  I’m so happy my douchey father has commanded me to marry you.

WAYNE:  Actually, I think it was that girl behind the computer screen, but you have big boobs so I’ll take what I can get.

ZOOEY:  That’s the sweetest thing anyone’s ever said to me.


ZOOEY:  Will you marry me?

Goddamn, that is one classy proposal.  Nice skivvies, chica.

WAYNE:  amg this is the happiest day of my life


In true legacy fashion, they exchanged rings right away.  Maybe the gen 2 heir will get an actual wedding.

It’s not likely, but maybe.

Aww… look at the happy couple.   God, I hope you two have ugly children.

Here’s Wayne after his makeover.  I gave him a fauxhawk.  I think he looks sufficiently douchey.

So.  Wayne Keaton-Jenkins brought $1742 in gifts and benefits to the Jenkins household.  He’s a Good Loner who’s athletic and never nude with daredevil tendencies. He’s a Capricorn, and likes classical music, key lime pie, and the colour red.  His goal is to become a Superstar Athlete.  And for some reason he has a police cruiser in his inventory.

And just to reiterate, Zooey’s goal is Master Mixologist and her traits are Athletic, Eco-Friendly, Perceptive, Neurotic and Daredevil.  She’s a Virgo.

To sum up:  Bring on Generation Two!


<— Chapter Seven Chapter Nine —>

  1. I voted for the first couple in the poll, but Wayne made me gag in my mouth D:

    I can’t wait for the babies!

  2. I find it incredibly funny that Zooey hangs out in her underwear. Perhaps clothing is a little too confining for her? Hope to see near-sighted ugly babies in the near future.

  3. Wayne is one of the most butt-ugly sims i’ve seen so far. sides maybe Zordon.

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