CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR: Moving On
XANDER: Boring, boring… Where are all the good jobs in this town?
As you night be able to tell, Xander’s all grown up now. Due to some extremely unfortunate circumstances, my TS3 save was lost forever, but I was inspired by my very best friend Starlatrix to restart my legacy in TS4 with Xander. This involved making Starla use a picture of Xander to re-create her for the new game, and me fighting with a lot of CC.
The end result is a sort-of-brand-new legacy, beginning with Xander in Windenberg. Why Windenberg, you ask?
XANDER: Because that’s where the rich people live, and I want to steal from them, LOL.
This is Xander’s home. Everything is black.
XANDER: LIKE MY HEART.
She is broke as hell and needs a job desperately, so she hops on her phone, as shown above, and promptly joins the criminal career track.
In case you don’t remember (since it’s been two years), in TS3, Xander’s lifetime aspiration was to be the Emperor of Evil. I’ve done my best to recreate TS3 Xander’s wants and traits in TS4, so criminal career track it is.
After getting her job, Xander spends some time reading and then goes to bed early. This leads to her waknig up at ass o’clock and going for yogurt because I forgot to give her a counter to actually make food on.
XANDER: Ahhhh, delicious giant bowl of yogurt.
After eating, I decide it’s time to get on the hunt for a husband. We have no time to waste, especially since Xander’s going to be working full time and can’t spend a lot of time out socializing. So, we join a club: The Renegades!
Max, the leader of the Renegades, is a high schooler. Xander is not impressed.
She’s supposed to be convincing him to let her join his super secret boyband, but she spends the entire conversation glaring at him like this.
XANDER: I could run your club better than you, Dougie.
MAX: I think you are great. You’re totally in! 😀
She endears herself to other club members by insulting them.
XANDER: You are fat and pale and your bathing suit sucks.
She’s in the club anyway, and none of the other members are ugly enough to suit our purposes, so Xander heads off to the local cafe to grab some food and scope out the not-hotties.
This is Shelby, candidate #1. He’s got the slob trait, but that’s all we know about him so far.
XANDER: His mustache upsets me. :c
Let’s see what else we can find.
Definitely too pretty.
Hmm… Possibility? It’s hard for me tot ell from this angle, but those cheekbones could come in handy in an uglacy.
It might be the face he’s making, but this could also be a candidate. Too bad I can’t remember anybody’s name but Not-a-Girl-Shelby’s.
After a largely fruitless search for a husband, Xander heads home…
… and is immediately greeted by the welcome wagon.
PEOPLE: HELLO, WELCOME TO WINDENBERG.
XANDER: What the fuck? None of you look rich.
They do look pretty ugly, though!
The two guys waste no time sizing each other up. That’s Edmund in the red, and Marcus in the orange. This isn’t very friendly behaviour for neighbours, is it? Both could be solid candidates for Xander’s spouse though!
Then Bette Midler shows up. (????)
With Bette comes the mailman and some weird snooty guy. I’m really digging Jedediah’s unibrow.
XANDER: I’m not.
In the interest of making my life easier, Xander decides to start a club.
XANDER: It’s called Ugly People. Would you like to join and have some fruitcake?
SNOOTY GUY: Uh, no thank you.
The roster, in case you’re curious:
Ugly People’s first order of business? Beating the shit out of each other.
JED and EDMUND: *KAPOW* *PLOOEY* *BANG* *SNAP*
Then it’s Xander and Edmund’s turn. I guess Ugly People is like Fight Club?
The club stays all night sitting around and chatting on Xander’s bed. Geoffrey Landraab is, apparently, expecting. And then…
Edmund ages up.
I guess it’s back to the drawing board on spouses. We’ll take another stab at things next time. Wish me uglies!
Chapter Twenty-Five —->